The first post of 2026. I do feel that as I grow more and more, new year doesn't feel as grand as I used to feel. New year means that time simply passes and I will age. The central question is: would I age up like milk or like a fine wine? Though, I don't know how a fine wine tastes, at least I want to feel like I'm not a spoiled milk as I grow up.

New year celebration often comes with the usual "New Resolutions!" posts, where each person states their resolution, their new goals, and those kind of things. While having a concrete and explicit goal is a good device to move you forward, I think it is something that as fragile as glass. Truly because in span of one year, too many things could change. As someone that is currently living as a corporate ~~slave~~ worker, the thing I fear the most every single time is the sudden layoff. Though, I am particularly positive that I can get through that, but that simply means a concrete goal is just hard to accomplish when your foundation isn't as strong. How I would define the "foundation" here is on the aspect whether you have safety net or something that can support you in case of such events occurs. For me, it is, partially out of question. There are a lot of things that I want to pursue that makes it hard to have good foundation. I mean, I technically still live from paycheck to paycheck as for now.

So that brings to a good question when I was in the toilet.

Instead of new resolutions, I think new stance is the best one.

This is something that based on the "deontological vs utilitarian" concept where former pursues the correctness of the action, while the latter pursues the overall outcome. Although I believe I just reduced the philosophy part into something tad too basic, I just want to point that it is in fact a very human concept and one should not be blamed for pursuing a certain side. It inherently has its own upsides and downsides, in which I left it as an exercise to the reader.

tehe~~

And I do think that how one should move forward is mainly mandated on their own beliefs, often putting the result as an afterthought. With this frame of mind, I do feel by establishing concrete, and correct stances, you eventually will arrive at the outcome you projected while keeping yourself sane from the pressure of achieving a specific goal. It, by the end of the year, should carry less pressure and guilt. This, in fact, because you will have the pressure be constantly applied throughout the year. I believe it is great for those that pursue discipline. And I am in dire need of such thing right now.

After all those yapping, I should arrive to the end goal, which is to just write down what is my stance. Or stances. Or whatever.

Stance #1 : Improve My Skills Everyday

I feel that while this is a natural thing to do, I feel like there are a lot of times in 2025 where I just opted to slack off because I have exhausted my brain juice. Truly wasn't the greatest thing to do, because I believe that the "flow state" requires at least 30 minutes to one hour before you are in that state, which ended up with me taking a lot of excuses to not start doing anything.

In this year, I'll focus on three of my main skills:

Programming
Illustration
Language

I do plan on adding music into my skillset, but I'll put it as an optional, on-a-whim kind of decision.

I think this should be a great stance to begin the new year off.

Stance #2 : More Time Aware

I think this is the hardest one because I just feel that it's really hard to stay alert towards the time. Especially when I'm in the flow state.

But I do think that it's something that I should start putting my mind on. I often stay up to 3AM just because I feel like time should not be wasted just like that. As I can start commuting to office around 10AM, I felt that the need of waking up early is not important. I wonder if it somehow messed up my circadian rhythm, so I think I should try to be more wise on how time flows around.

I want to start doing any of the creative stuff or the self-improvement stuff around 7PM, and then sleep at 12AM. In the middle of it, I want to incorporate the thought of maintaining my body and health. Having a fit body should contribute better into having a better time management. Or maybe it's the other way around.

とにかく、I think I should start by buying myself a wall clock for this.

Stance #3 : Financially Disciplined

I'll be 26 years old this year. It's sad, because I haven't feel like I have accomplished something big. And one thing that always haunts me, is my financial condition.

I have a lot of things to pursue and to buy, and while my current salary is enough to give me a comfortable life, I am aware that I have been really sloppy and irresponsible towards my own pockets. The worst of it, is that after working for almost 2 years at a well-established company, and with great pay at it, I am still living from paycheck to paycheck. It's sad, isn't it?

I am blaming to how easy it is to take a bank loan and to pay with credit. It feels like I have a lot of money, while in fact I am just losing money. So I think that's where I should start: to finally be debt free.

My only dilemma is with how the RAM prices are hiking and spiking so fast lately, that I feel like I need to secure myself one before it's too late. I have the buying power, but what I should be doing now is to properly do my financial planning. Previously, it was really bad. It failed because the lack of discipline on filling out the data. So I think it's something that I should be working and put as stance for 2026. I hope that I will end up with something to save but also something to enjoy by the end of the year, especially with my plan of going to Comiket 109 in December.

Stance #4 : Putting Myself First

Last year, I told myself that I should broaden my view and try to discover new communities. It was fun! I got to meet new people and even work with some of them. But I have a bad institution, which I tend to become a people pleaser. It productively being counter-productive into making myself happy.

The tendency should end here as I will try to be more of an egoist. But this is more into where I'll become mostly passive, only reactive if being reached out. Previously, I have the tendency to try to lend my hand because "I can", without thinking too much whether it would please myself even.

Some might see that this sounds like a bad stance, but I have come to this conclusion after several bad experiences prior. I have come to the point where other's happiness won't directly contribute to my happiness as well, so I think it's about time for me to put myself first.

After Thoughts

These stances, should be combined with a set of goals and resolutions, in which I have set as well. But instead of chasing for the goal, I will put more thoughts into the stances, first-class.

Good luck to me, I guess. 2026 will a one hell of a ride.

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2026 : A New Stance